Sunday, July 20, 2008

GET OFF THE FENCE!

I've heard it said that if you sit on the fence long enough, you'll get splinters. Or you'll fall off. Either outcome is tragic when you consider the fact that by making a choice, you can save yourself the trouble. Making choices is not always easy and there may be some short term pain involved. But it has been my experience that prolonging the decision can also prolong the pain.

If you find yourself in a situation that repeats itself and ends badly on a regular basis, it might be time for you to get off the fence and make a choice. Sitting on the fence can be toxic for you and the people around you. It can stir controversy and often forces you to play two sides of a controversy just for the sake of being neutral which in my opinion either makes you weak or makes you a liar.

Everyone can't be Switzerland. Sometimes you MUST choose.

The other day at work, I approached a co-worker and said, "Can I ask you a question?" His response was, "Am I going to have to pick a side?"

My gut reaction was "HELL YEAH! You're gonna have to pick a fucking side." But I said no. I really just wanted an opinion against which I could weigh my own. Contrary to popular belief, I don't always think I'm right. Just because I have an opinion on just about everything and I blog about those things... That doesn't mean I always think I'm RIGHT. It's just my opinion. I am fully aware that there are other opinions out there. The point is, I didn't need my co-worker to go all Switzerland on me. I needed an opinion and maybe a reality check.

I deal with the same issues with my friends. Sometimes you just can't be friends with everyone. Because when you play both sides, you do end up lying because you don't want to hurt people. Or you tell the truth and you end up stirring the big ugly pot and you hurt people anyway. It's a double edged sword. It's a fence FULL of splinters. You can't just ride it out. It evokes drama and senseless arguing that could be avoided if you'd just make a damn decision.

The saddest part of all this fence riding is that by remaining neutral, you alienate others. Then, who's going to pull out those splinters or lend you hand when you fall on your ass?

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