Being 40: Justin Matisse, Where Are You?

Why has Justin Matisse never walked into my house, sanded off my front porch, built some shelves and pulled me out of my love sick wallowing? 

In spite of my greatest efforts to grow into an independent woman who makes her own money and takes care of herself, all I've ever wanted was to be swept off my feet. In fact, deep in the heart and soul, I think most women just want to be carried away by a dashing and competent man.

But we work so hard to prove we can stand on our own two feet and buy our own shoes to put on those feet and often times pave the road upon which those feet walk that it seems as if there's no room for a man to swoop in and do the sweeping.

Filmmakers in the 80s and 90s are partially to blame for the conundrum I find myself in today. I grew up watching girls in movies pining over guys with whom they had no chance in hell. And at the end of every movie the guy showed up wherever that girl was. Just out of the blue! He chased her down, did the work and met her right where she was! And instantly her life changed from sad and pathetic to practically perfect! 

As I watched those films over and over, I believed that anything was possible for me too. Why wouldn't the guy of my dreams suddenly realize that I was THE ONE for him and just show up? 

For years, I have said that I would know a guy was the one for me if he just showed up. If he was leaning on a red porsche across the street from church waiting for me to exit through the front doors... If he was holding a giant boom box over his head playing our song for me... If he was taking our friendship for granted but later ditched his date to seal our relationship with a kiss... If he left the prom hastily because he was so in love with me he couldn't bear it... Oh wait. That's not right. 

The point is... I haven't really been waiting for Justin Matisse or Jake Ryan. I've just been waiting for a guy to make the effort and meet me where I am. Sometimes a simple gesture is the greatest one. Showing up. Doesn't

cost you anything but time.