Friend

It is in situations of strife and controversy that you find out who is willing to toe the line for you. It is in your darkest moments that you discover who will step outside a busy life and stand watch over you until dawn. It is in times of need- be it encouragement, prayer, a warm hug or hand or heart or something even more tangible- when dependability surfaces and relationships are affirmed. It is in the recognition of these things and the willingness to submit to the aid of others that a friend is defined. And it is in returning the favor out of selflessness and not merely duty that the definition is complete.

Phenomenal Woman

Some time after I turned 30 years old, I stopped considering the opinions of strangers and started loving myself. Yet, I am still bothered when someone calls me "fat." Personally, I have embraced the word. It's not a "dirty" or "mean" word in my vocabulary. It is merely a descriptor. When others say it, however, it is meant to be hurtful. It is an attack. It amazes me that even as we age (and as some of us mature), calling someone "fat ass" or pointing out the obvious is still as satisfying as it was when we were twelve. (Yes, I said pointing out the obvious. It's not like I am unaware that I am fat. I have lived in this body for quite some time now...)

The road to self-love is long and winding and rocky. But there is no final destination. This is a journey filled with daily discoveries. And to this point what I have discovered is that no matter the package, the gift of me is still a phenomenal woman.

And so I share with you a poem by Maya Angelou. Her words say it best...

Phenomenal Woman

Pretty women wonder where my secret lies.

I'm not cute or built to suit a fashion model's size

But when I start to tell them,

They think I'm telling lies.

I say,

It's in the reach of my arms

The span of my hips,

The stride of my step,

The curl of my lips.

I'm a woman

Phenomenally.

Phenomenal woman,

That's me.

I walk into a room

Just as cool as you please,

And to a man,

The fellows stand or

Fall down on their knees.

Then they swarm around me,

A hive of honey bees.

I say,

It's the fire in my eyes,

And the flash of my teeth,

The swing in my waist,

And the joy in my feet.

I'm a woman

Phenomenally.

Phenomenal woman,

That's me.

Men themselves have wondered

What they see in me.

They try so much

But they can't touch

My inner mystery.

When I try to show them

They say they still can't see.

I say,

It's in the arch of my back,

The sun of my smile,

The ride of my breasts,

The grace of my style.

I'm a woman

Phenomenally.

Phenomenal woman,

That's me.

Now you understand

Just why my head's not bowed.

I don't shout or jump about

Or have to talk real loud.

When you see me passing

It ought to make you proud.

I say,

It's in the click of my heels,

The bend of my hair,

The palm of my hand,

The need of my care,

'Cause I'm a woman

Phenomenally.

Phenomenal woman,

That's me.